All posts in category Goals

Goals Update – Knowing God and Jesus Christ

So…as far as my goal this year (which is losing weight, as lame as that may sound), I’m not making much progress, per se. I haven’t lost weight. I am exercising more, and I’m feeling better, but I still have changes that I need make before I see any real results.

A while ago, I read a book by Robert Lustig – Fat Chance: Beating the Odds against Sugar…. I liked it because I realized that I am a sugar addict, and that there is more to health than just looking skinny (which is something I’ve always suspected). Anyways. Even though this seems lame, weight loss has been a real personal trial for me. I haven’t always been overweight. A few years ago, I ran a marathon! Only recently did I put on weight (with my last child), and I haven’t taken it off (he’s 2 now!!!) I’ve noticed that both my relationship with food and the perception I have of myself have changed. Neither of them have changed in a good way.

I’m including this stuff on this blog because I’m convinced that my struggle has a spiritual connection.

A friend of mine gave me the book Not My Will but Thine by the late Elder Neal A. Maxwell. It has been helping me as I consider my desires, goals, and the will of the Lord. I know that the Lord will answer my prayers, I just need to learn how to align my will with His.

Two things struck me when I read the first chapter:

“…God really is a loving, Father God, not a distant cosmic presence.” (Maxwell, Not My Will but Thine, p. 3)

and

“Jesus Christ has been, is, and will be our empathic Advocate with the Father. Not only is He our Advocate, but He helps us through our individual ordeals. By His own suffering, He was perfected, including in His capacity to help us with our individual suffering.” (Maxwell, Not My Will but Thine, 3-4)

Nature - one sure way to feel God's influence in our lives.

Nature – one sure way to feel God’s influence in our lives.

God is really a loving Father God

(and not a distant cosmic presence). Do you really know that? Do I really know that? Do I remember it? I have to say, yes I know it, but no I don’t always remember. I have felt close to Heavenly Father – close enough to know that He truly is a Father that loves me. Yet there are times when I feel distance. Of course, that is my fault – usually distance is a result of lazy prayers.

But, even when I’m praying well, there are some times when it is hard to feel God’s real presence in my life. Or I feel it, but I want to feel more of it.

Jesus Christ is our Advocate and Helper

I know that Jesus Christ is my advocate with Heavenly Father. I know that He helps me. I know that there is nothing (in and of myself) that I can do to receive blessings or comfort from God. Everything I have received has been because of Christ’s mercy.

I know that the key to unlocking the power of the atonement in my life is through repentance, faith, and covenant making (and keeping). I know that I depend on my Savior for everything.

But there are times when I know that I underestimate exactly how powerful He is. For example – He knows my ordeals. My ordeals are ordeals. Even if it sounds stupid, being frustrated with myself physically, is still an ordeal. My ordeal is not because I can’t see my value as a woman and daughter of God. It is because I’m not living to my potential. It is because I have some real physical weaknesses, and I need Christ’s help to overcome them. Our ordeals and trials are always based on the conditions of mortality – our weakness.

Sometimes I forget how Christ can help me with all of my trials – even ones that don’t seem as crucial or important. I forget that Christ knows what it’s like to feel depressed or down. And he knows how to uplift. I forget that he has experienced all that I have experienced. I don’t have to endure this trial alone. I can take Christ’s yoke upon me, and he will help me to overcome.

So…while I don’t want to over-think things all day long, it is good for me to recognize that when I think about my goals, I can see a clear connection between my progress (or lack of progress) and my willingness to activate the power of the atonement in my life. If I’m feeling weak (in other words, if I want cookies), then I can go to the Lord for strength. I can pray that the Lord will strengthen me as I try to employ good habits (like portion control, good eating, and exercise) in my life. I can also pray that I won’t get bogged down on day to day issues, but that I will see the big picture, and be grateful for a working body, loving husband, and good life. Remembering My relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ really can help me obtain any goal or get through any ordeal.

How do you use the atonement to overcome weakness and difficulty in your life? How have you grown closer to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ? How do you keep your relationship with Heavenly Father real and relevant?

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by chococatania on February 24, 2013  •  Permalink
Posted in 2013, Goals, Testimonies
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Posted by chococatania on February 24, 2013

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2013/02/24/goals-update-knowing-god-and-jesus-christ/

Humble Prayer and Obtaining Goals

If you read this blog, then you already know what my main goal for this year is.

This year, my goal is based on changing my weaknesses. Usually, my goals have something to do with a strength. For example, last year, I had a goal to write a book. I love writing, so even though it was a lot of hard work, I was able to do it. I naturally like writing. This desire fit right into what I already like and am good at. It was a way to magnify my already existing strengths.

This year, however, losing weight and living the word of wisdom, is not a goal that magnifies my strengths. Instead, it contradicts a weakness.

With this understanding, I have decided to “attack” this weakness of mine on several levels. Of course, there is the practical level – like diet and exercise. But, because I’m actually dealing with a weakness (both physical and spiritual), making these temporal changes isn’t enough. The changes don’t “stick”. I buckle in times of stress and myself just turning my wheels.

However, change is possible – when it comes to weakness – any weakness – we can enlist the help of the Lord.

“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” – Ether 12:27

We know that the Lord has given us weakness. Weakness presents itself in various ways. However, weakness, in and of itself, is not a sin. In fact, it is a gift from God – that we can be humble. It is when we are humble that we qualify for the grace that Christ offers us through His atonement. When we humble ourselves and having faith in Christ, He will enable us – making weak things strong. I truly hope for this day in my life.

Prayer and humbling ourselves before God

"Prayer will change the night to day."

“Prayer will change the night to day.”

When I think of humbling myself before God, I think of the most obvious thing: prayer. Is there a more genuine expression of humility? Perhaps it doesn’t seem like such an amazing thing, but we have to study what prayer truly is. The Bible Dictionary gives such a great explanation:

“As soon as we learn the true relationship in which we stand toward God (namely, God is our Father, and we are his children), then at once prayer becomes natural and instinctive on our part. Many of the so-called difficulties about prayer arise from forgetting this relationship. Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them. Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work, and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings.” – Prayer – Bible Dictionary

I feel like learning to make my prayers better – true and humble prayer will help me to unlock the grace that Christ wants to give me – making weak things strong.

Learn our True Relationship with God

I know that I am a daughter of God. I know that He loves me. This does make me want to pray. In fact, there are times when I forget, when I’m tired, or when I’m not feeling particularly worthy to pray. But it is when I remember that He is my Father, that He Created me, that He loves me – I am moved to pray. I admit that my prayers need improvement, but I don’t want to go through this life without recognizing God. As far as understanding my relationship to God goes, I’m good with this.

Prayer and the Correspondence of will

Here’s where things get hairy for me. When I pray, I know that I’m not praying according to the will of God.

Now…I have absolutely no doubt that Heavenly Father wants me to eat healthy. I think that the Lord is more than happy with my desire to lose weight. I have had spiritual confirmation of this. However, I am beginning to see that my will does not line up with his in one regard.

Sometimes, I think that through prayer, I’ll just magically be able to lose weight – without regards to what I’m eating or doing. I realize that I’m like the kid who doesn’t do any homework, doesn’t study, but then, during the test, starts praying desperately – to get an A. It isn’t that God wasn’t willing to grant the student an “A” score. Of course it was in God’s will to have him pass the test. But it wasn’t in God’s will to grant an “A” without the work required.

Blessings are predicated on laws.

I understand the laws. I know that I am going to have to give up my natural desires if I want to receive blessings. I have to become humble.

I love the example of King Lamoni’s father – who was willing to give away all of His sins for the desires of his heart. (See Alma 22:18). I’m not following this example. My will hasn’t changed. I haven’t come humbly before the Lord. I want the Lord to bless me with His grace without giving up my sins – my carnal nature – my appetites.

So…for now, I’m just working on that. I’m praying more. I know that the Lord can even help me with this. I want to be able to change my will. And it is helping. As I pray that my desires will change, that I will be able to exercise sufficient humility, the Lord has blessed me with increased knowledge and help. There are layers involved in my weakness, and I’m grateful that the Lord is so patient with me.

***

How do you sufficiently humble yourself before God – and align your will with His? What are ways that you have been able to make prayer effective in overcoming weakness and achieving goals?

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by chococatania on January 27, 2013  •  Permalink
Posted in 2013, Goals
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Posted by chococatania on January 27, 2013

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2013/01/27/humble-prayer-and-obtaining-goals/

My Name is Catania, and I am a Sugar Addict

I usually try to keep this a rather spiritual blog. And it still will be, but I have a goal this year – to get back into my pre-preganancy clothes (yes…it’s been two years, so it depresses me). This is not a particularly spiritual goal. At least, not on the outset.

For me, this goal is actually extremely spiritual. You see, for some reason, my dissatisfaction with the way that I have treated my physical body, my temple, has kind of taken over my life and brain. It isn’t good. So…simple – lose weight, right? I wish it was that simple.

Last week, I fasted and prayed that I would be able to reach my goal this year. Losing weight is my only goal. And maybe that isn’t a great goal. Maybe i should state it in another way. I don’t know. I’m searching. But I do know one thing – in the past, I have been happy with myself physically. Right now I’m not. As I fasted, I felt hopeful – like, with the help of the Lord, that this goal is something that I would be able to accomplish – even though it will take self control and time.

Before I go on, you should know that in my patriarchal blessing, I have been counseled to keep the word of wisdom. It is funny, when I received my patriarchal blessing, I didn’t understand why this warning would have been given to me. I never had any kid of proclivity towards alcohol, caffeine, or drugs. As a youth, I kind of shrugged this counsel off. Of course, as I’ve gotten older, and have studied the Word of Wisdom, I realize that keeping the Word of Wisdom is way more than not smoking or drinking. It is a general health code, and a real blessing for our time.

So…why am I blogging about this? I think that it is so I can keep it in the forefront of my mind. I also think that I’m not the only one who struggles with health and weight issues. In fact, as I fasted last week, I also felt the reminder that the problem I struggle with – truly keeping the word of wisdom and being overweight – is not something I’m dealing with alone. It is, in fact, of epidemic proportions – and maybe even more. Interesting. So, hopefully, if I blog about this, I can be of help to someone else. Additionally, if you read this, maybe you can help me.

Last Monday (I think), I heard an interview with Doctor Robert Lustig about his new book Fat Chance: Beating the Odds Against Sugar, Processed Food, Obesity, and Disease. I have read plenty of books about diet and exercise. I’ve read everything from books by Jillian Michaels and other famous “personal trainers” to books by Medical Doctors (like Lustig’s book, or other authors like Dr. David Kessler). I have also read books by Michael Pollan. They have been helpful. But this book by Dr. Lustig was just what I needed.

Two of the most profound thoughts I had while reading the book were:
Sugar is a poison – I don’t think that this means we can never have sugar. But the way we – I – eat sugar is harmful – to my liver, my hormonal system, my body. Sugar is truly addictive – in that it fits the criteria for addiction. Sugar raises insulin, causes Leptin resistance, numbs dopamine receptors, and raises seratonin. Our bodies love it even though it really isn’t that good for us.

Now, the thing is – we need energy, and sugar is a good source for that. Naturally occurring sugars (like that found in fruit) is nearly always found with fiber. When we eat natural sugars, we also eat a lot of fiber – causing less sugar to be absorbed, and more of the healthy signals (like fullness) to be sent to our brains – as fiber is very filling. Fiber keeps us regular. And less sugar keeps our other organs and hormones in check.

I need to eat less sugar. I am a sugar addict! I always choose sugary, processed foods over healthy foods. Too much sugar has interrupted my body’s ability to feel full and satisfied. And, I have no idea what it has done to me on a mitochondrial level. The effects of sugar can cause liver disease, diabetes, heart disease, hypertension, stroke, and cancer. I really don’t want any of those.

Yet…sugar beckons, and my desire for sugar often outweighs the desire I have to be healthy.

The Food Industry Knows that Sugar is Addictive The idea that kept going through my head was from the Doctrine and Covenants:

” In consequence of evils and designs which do and will exist in the hearts of conspiring men in the last days, I have warned you, and forewarn you, by giving unto you this word of wisdom by revelation—” – Doctrine and Covenants 89:4

I really think this is true. We have seen this before – with the tobacco industry. They knew that tobacco was bad, but didn’t want to hurt profits. They were in bed with our government, and kept pushing a product they knew to be both addictive and lethal.

I imagine it is pretty much the same with the food industry. Why would I trust them? I’m not sure that they are worried about my health, but their own bottom line.

***
I don’t want to sound all alarmist or conspiracy theorist, but those were the two thoughts that ran through my mind as I read the book. I need to trust God, and He has given us the best advice on health. I need to do better at eating plants and fruits in their seasons. That is the real place to start.

What are you doing to live a healthier life? Do you have similar New years goals???

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by chococatania on January 13, 2013  •  Permalink
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Posted by chococatania on January 13, 2013

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2013/01/13/my-name-is-catania-and-i-am-a-sugar-addict/

New Year, New Goals, New Customs

This year, I wanted to be less “goal oriented” and more “resolution oriented.” I wanted to focus not only on the accomplishment, but also the journey to that accomplishment. Mostly, I wanted to be more disciplined.

I think that it went well, for the most part. I gave myself 21-day challenges throughout the year. They included prayer, drinking water, exercising every day, and tracking what I was eating (there were others, too). I feel like I also accomplished a lot throughout the year. We moved cross-country, I wrote and made a scripture study ebook available here on my blog, I wrote and illustrated a book for my kids, I also wrote a chapter book for my older kids. I got a hysterectomy, sold a house, and bought a new one. I continued working on some projects that I’ve had in the works for a long time. I finished some projects (like little crafts and such), and I started new ones. It has been a good year.

Yet there is one thing that I haven’t accomplished that I want to do. This single failure makes me think of a quote from Les Miserables (the actual book, not movie/play):

“Do we ever realize our fondest dreams?” – Victor Hugo

Good question. It seems like there would be a lot of “no’s” as an answer. I know that, for me, if I took a look at what I consider to be my “fondest dreams,” right now there may be more “no’s” than I’d like.

So – why is it that I’m not realizing my fondest dreams? Or, if there have been times when I have realized my dream – what did I do differently that worked?

Three things that may stop us from realizing our dreams

  • Fear – We may be afraid to take a step. There is a fear of failure. And, perhaps, we’re afraid of success…what would the dream be if we achieved this dream?
  • The Safety of Victimization – It seems strange, but I think that sometimes we don’t realize our dreams because we get some kind of (sick) reward from feeling sorry for ourselves because we have an unobtainable dream. And I think that it may hold us back more than we realize. For example, I want to lose weight, and I think about it – what would I do if I couldn’t complain about being overweight? What would I do if I couldn’t feel sorry for myself? Perhaps these actions – the self-depricating humor, the defeated attitude, the destructive and self-invented feelings (like my husband would love me more if I was thinner) is something I’m holding onto, and it is precisely why I can’t achieve my fondest dreams.
  • The dream is far off – Sometimes, the dream is so far away, that we end up procrastinating pursuing it. Since it won’t be realized for a long time, there seems to be little motivation to change – we won’t see the reward for such a change immediately, so we are tempted to keep giving into the momentary reward rather than saving up for the big one. It is stupid when we think about it with the big picture, but it is so easy to do. It is easy to be tempted by instant gratification. And I think that sometimes, the things that we do to feel “instant gratification” comes at the expense of the long-term gratification of realizing our fond dreams.

Another Hint for Change

I think that we can get a hint to help us change from another quote that I really like…

“It is not enough to abolish abuses; custom must also be transformed. The mill was pulled down, but the wind still blows.” – Victor Hugo, Les Miserables

When it comes to realizing our dreams, we can’t just “abolish abuses”…instead, we need to make a fundamental shift. We need to change our customs. If we knock down the mill, but the wind still blows, then it is only a matter of time before we end up building a new mill.

I totally love this concept, and I think that this is what I’m going to try to do this year.

For 2013, I’m going to focus on only one goal at a time. I’m setting one goal right now (with the understanding that I will maintain the good things I’m already doing). My 2013 goal is to lose 30 pounds or fit back into my pre-T-Rex pants. This one goal will bless my life in more than one area: physical, emotional, and spiritual. That is the only goal I’m writing on my list right now! Crazy. I feel like it is wrong to have only one goal! But that’s it. I’m focusing on the one thing.

I am focusing on this because I realize it is a current weakness/need. I know my personality. I will keep doing things I like to do. No doubt that by the end of 2013 I will have finished other projects, maybe written another book for my children, and done some other things that I will be proud of. But I want to be sure that weight loss is included in this laundry list of accomplishments. I know, also, that if losing 30 pounds is the only thing I do, then I’ll be happy. However, if I do a dozen other good things, yet I haven’t mastered my physical weakness, then I will still feel a little disappointed with myself.

So – that’s it. I’m working on my health. I promise myself I will realize my fondest dream. And I am going to work on more than “abolishing abuses” but changing my customs and stopping the wind.

***

What about you? Do you have any goals? Do you have any weaknesses you hope to overcome? How do you plan on achieving your fondest dreams?

3 Comments
by chococatania on December 30, 2012  •  Permalink
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Posted by chococatania on December 30, 2012

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2012/12/30/new-year-new-goals-new-customs/

Changing Habits – Weakness into Strength

So, this year, I’ve been trying to focus on discipline. There are goals that I have for the year. I’d like to lose weight. I’d like to begin learning Italian. I’d like to create some artwork and write. I’d like to be a better mother, wife, daughter, and friend. You know…I want to be a better human, in general.

As I’ve pondered my goals, I’ve come to the realization that I don’t want to merely do a bunch of stuff, but I want to become a better person. So, I’ve been addressing habits. Since the beginning of the year, I’ve been making new, good habits (21 days at a time). It has been going really well.

Recently, I picked up a book: The Power of Habit, by Charles Duhrigg. It has been a fascinating read.

There is one concept I found especially interesting:

“…You can never truly extinguish bad habits.

Rather, to change a habit you must keep the old cue, and deliver the old reward, but insert a new routine.

That’s the rule: If you use the same cue, and provide the same reward, you can shift the routine and change the habit. Almost any behavior can be transformed if the cue and reward stay the same.” – Charles Duhigg, The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business.

So…here’s the thing, we all have habits. And unfortunately, some of our habits are bad. We crack our knuckles, or bite our nails. Or maybe stop at McDonald’s on the way home from the supermarket. Habits that have been deeply engrained are difficult to stop because our brains are used to seeing the cue (the golden arches), performing a routine (stopping at the drive-thru), and then receiving a reward (a nice snack). We may make the choice to pass McDonald’s, despite the craving. And it is kind of hard – harder than it should be, right? We pass it, and think of the golden fries. The greasy burger-ish thing. Even though we know that the food is less than desireable, our mouths water, and we try to congratulate ourselves for not giving in.

Perhaps there is a better way.

Perhaps, instead of using will power to give up (usually temporarily) a habit, we use our will power to change it.

For example, we go to the supermarket, purchase a fruit that can be eaten in the car, and when we pass the golden arches, we get that cue, our mouths water, and we unpeel a banana. It may not be quite what our mouths expect, but it will still deliver the reward: a tasty snack. Plus, we will feel the added reward of making a good choice and eating a healthy food. Soon, the habit will be Golden Arches → Bananas!

As I have contemplated this idea, the thought came to me I recognize this concept…

“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” – Ether 12:27

The Lord teaches us here that we don’t have to give up our weak things on our own. He doesn’t expect us to abandon our bad habits – leaving the void of cravings or possibly addiction and the probability of relapse. He understands how our brains work.

He will show us our weak things, and through His grace, He will make our weak things strong. The habits that we make can be shifted. Instead of “rewiring” our brains, we just learn how to change the routine. We learn how to make the habit: the cue, routine, and reward something that enriches our lives rather than depletes it.

Shifting our habits – making our weak things strong – is difficult work, but we can accomplish this if we humbly remember the Lord. Through his grace and strength, he will help us.

I’m so grateful for the gospel. It gives me hope. There are times I have felt a little discouraged – it seems like making changes is impossible, but I know that I can learn how to do it. I know that the Lord has blessed me with the tools to overcome. I know that He will help me to create good habits out of pre-existing bad ones.

With the help of the Lord, have you ever made a “weak thing” strong? How did you make the change?

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by chococatania on April 19, 2012  •  Permalink
Posted in Book of Mormon, Discipline 2012, Discipline and The Process 2012, Ether, Goals, Insights
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Posted by chococatania on April 19, 2012

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2012/04/19/changing-habits-weakness-into-strength/

Making New Habits – 21 Day Challenges

So…earlier this year, I decided that I wanted to have my New Year’s Resolution more than a bunch of goals that I would accomplish (or not) and then forget about.

I have decided that instead of doing a bunch of things, I wanted to become someone.

I’ve been haunted by this idea. I know that it is good. There are times when I mourn for what I think that I used to be. I feel like right now, I’m not the best version of myself.

Here is a picture of me with the family a few years ago (before Sasquatch and T-Rex)

Summer 2008

It is honestly hard for me to look at this old picture. I’m happy that we have our two new little ones, but I’m not happy with what I’ve become in the meantime. My body has been trashed, and I have had a tough time getting it back together.

It seems like other problems have stemmed from that. I’m a big believer in the whole mind-body connection. I’ve been more stressed and depressed, and it shows – especially in my thighs!

I know that my weight isn’t my show of worthiness, but I have a closet-full of clothes that I can’t wear, and when I see myself, I feel like I don’t see myself. I feel like I’m not as happy, creative, loving, or funny as I once was…so, this year, I haven’t wanted to do things, I have wanted to become someone – the new old me.

So…year after year, I try to make changes. On January first I tell myself that I’m going to eat well, never eat treats, exercise 90 minutes a day, read the scriptures an hour day, sketch every day, read every day, write every day, do meaningful activities with the kids daily, spend more time with my husband, catch up on family history…you get the idea.

So – I make all of these crazy goals. I expect to start doing them instantly and I fail immediately.

I have forgotten the principle of learning and becoming:

“For behold, thus saith the Lord God: I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more; and from them that shall say, We have enough, from them shall be taken away even that which they have.” – 2 Nephi 28:30

The Lord knows that we learn and change a little bit at a time. I have tended to forget this – which brings the insane resolutions and quick failures.

So, this year, I made resolutions. I have set the time frame – that I want to do these things by the end of the year, but that each change will be introduced throughout the year – when I’m ready to take a step. For example, I can’t expect myself to eat really healthy in one day. It is going to take a longer time to change these bad habits into good ones.

OKAY!

So – I’m making little habit changes. I’ve heard that it takes about 21 days to make a habit. I have no idea if this is true or not, but it seems like a good place to start. I’m making small changes and concentrating on only one thing for 3 weeks.

For the first three weeks, I concentrated on drinking at least 8 glasses of water every day. It started pretty difficult. It is hard to do something completely different. At first, I didn’t really want to drink so much water, I kind of had to force myself. After a few days, I realized I was thirsty all the time. Interesting – I had deprived myself from water for so long, I think that my body didn’t know what to do at first. After about 2 weeks, I was finally used to it: drinking. It wasn’t a struggle. I had to go to the bathroom more, for sure, but I felt good – knowing that my body was working better, that my organs are functioning, and they are getting the water they need.

For the next 3 weeks, I decided to eat at least 2 servings of fruit and 3 servings of vegetables every day. (Total: 5 servings). This has been pretty hard. At first, it was really hard. I’m addicted to sugar, and I wasn’t really excited about taking the time to eat things like fruits and veggies. I didn’t cut out sugar, though. I still ate whatever I wanted to whenever I wanted to – with the understanding that I had to eat at least 5 servings of fruits/veggies.

Now – I’m in the third 3 weeks. I’m working on cutting out sugars during the week. I’m definitely a sugar addict. This three weeks, I’m allowing myself a small serving of chocolate every day. On Saturdays or Sundays, I can bake with the kids, but eat moderately – like one or two cookies…not a batch. I’ve been going back and forth on what this goal should be, but I think that this is it. Kicking the sugar habit is really hard. Even though I might write about it more later, but I’m starting it today. (I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it earlier this week because of Valentine’s day).

I don’t know what my future goals will be. I will know what they are when I get closer to finishing the current goal. I don’t want to overwhelm myself, I just want to focus on what I’m doing right now.

Oh yeah – I’m still drinking water, eating fruits and veggies. Just because I’ve gotten through these small goals doesn’t mean that they stop. In fact, I hope that these things are always a part of who I am. (When I’m sixty-three, I want to be able to say to you, “I’ve been eating 5 fruits/veggies and drinking 8 glasses of water every day for the last 30 years).

I want to become healthy, happy, creative, funny. I want to be the best woman I’m capable of being. I know that Heavenly Father sees my full potential. I want to be able to live up to it.

So, I’m starting small and working on it a little at a time.

What are you doing to become a better person? Do you have any tips on how to create and keep good habits?

10 Comments
by chococatania on February 19, 2012  •  Permalink
Posted in Discipline 2012, Discipline and The Process 2012, Goals, Uncategorized
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Posted by chococatania on February 19, 2012

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2012/02/19/making-new-habits-21-day-challenges/

Intuition, Intellect, and The Gift of the Holy Ghost

Currently, I’m reading the biography, Steve Jobs, by Walter Isaacson. It is a fascinating read so far (I’m only a third of the way into it). Anyhow…this post isn’t about Steve Jobs or the book. Instead, it is about something I read in the book and how it relates to my understanding of the gospel.

Steve Jobs, while he was in his early twenties, decided to go to India – on a spiritual quest. He was interested in Buddhism and Zen. He went to India, searching. Then, years later, he tells (Isaacson)

“Coming back to America was, for me, much more of a cultural shock than going to India. The people in the Indian countryside don’t use their intellect like we do, they use their intuition instead, and their intuition is far more developed than the rest of the world. Intuition is a very powerful thing, more powerful than intellect, in my opinion. Thats’ had a big impact on my work.

   Western rational thought is not an innate human characteristic; it is learned and it is the great achievement of Western civilization. In the villages of India, they never learned it. They learned something else, which is in some ways just as valuable but in other ways is not. That’s the power of intuition and experiential wisdom.

   Coming back after seven months in Indian villages, I saw the craziness of the Western world as well as its capacity for rational thought. If you just sit and observe, you will see how restless your mind is. If you try to calm it, it only makes it worse, but over time it does calm, and when it does, there’s room to hear more subtle things—that’s when your intuition starts to blossom and you start to see things more clearly and be in the present more. Your mind just slows down, and you see a tremendous expanse in the moment. You see so much more than you could see before. It’s a discipline; you have to practice it.” – Steve Jobs

I found this really interesting – especially when approaching it within the context of the gospel.

Intuition and intellect…

Try thinking about this quote and substitute the word intuition with The Spirit or Revelation.

This is when I love being a Mormon. I love thinking about the gospel. I love thinking about how we learn, and how Heavenly Father wants us to learn. I think about the knowledge that is available, and that we learn it through more than one avenue. We can be spiritually minded and rational. In fact, I think that it is irrational to think that Spirituality is out of the question. Intuition and intellect can be related, and when they are, we can see more clearly and make better decisions.

Intuition is a very powerful thing, more powerful than intellect, in my opinion.
If we substitute here The Spirit or Revelation for the word Intuition, then I have to agree with Steve Jobs’ assessment. Having the Spirit is a very powerful thing, and much more powerful than intellect.

When we open ourselves to the Spirit, then we open ourselves to knowledge beyond our own capability. We open ourselves to God’s knowledge. His Spirit will speak to our spirits, and we can be guided. This is much more powerful than relying on our own limited power.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:8-9

It is ridiculous to think that we could rely on ourselves – always. How could our own intellect even come close to the knowledge of the Lord? No matter how smart we are, we are still basically nothing. Having the Spirit to guide us is always more powerful than relying on our own intellect.

[Intellect and Rational thought] is in some ways just as valuable [as intuition] but in other ways is not.

Of course, I feel like I want to mention that intellect is not good for nothing. We can’t just throw our intellects and rational thoughts out the window. In fact, the opposite is true. We need to have strong active intellects. Often, our intellects give us more avenues to feel the promptings of the Spirit. Or, sometimes the solutions we seek will be based on our intellectual capacity. When we increase our intellect, we give God and His Spirit more to work with.

We need to use both our own intellect and the gift of the Holy Ghost. In fact, the Lord has taught us this principle when he taught the pattern to receiving revelation.

“Behold, you have not understood; you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me.

But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.

But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong; therefore, you cannot write that which is sacred save it be given you from me.” – Doctrine and Covenants 9:7-9

It is as we use our intellect and rational thought to try to understand and solve our problems that the Lord sends His witness.

In the Doctrine and Covenants, the Savior admonishes us to gain more knowledge of this world:

“Teach ye diligently and my grace shall attend you, that you may be instructed more perfectly in theory, in principle, in doctrine, in the law of the gospel, in all things that pertain unto the kingdom of God, that are expedient for you to understand;

Of things both in heaven and in the earth, and under the earth; things which have been, things which are, things which must shortly come to pass; things which are at home, things which are abroad; the wars and the perplexities of the nations, and the judgments which are on the land; and a knowledge also of countries and of kingdoms—

That ye may be prepared in all things when I shall send you again to magnify the calling whereunto I have called you, and the mission with which I have commissioned you.” – Doctrine and Covenants 88:78-80

As we increase our understanding of this world – all aspects of it, then we will increase our capacity to receive better instruction from the Lord. Our Spirits and intellects are divinely tied to one another. They compliment and magnify each other.

“I saw the craziness of the Western world as well as its capacity for rational thought.”
We do live in a world that is a bit crazy, and I struggle with this. I let so many things get in the way. I feel like a squirrel or a raccoon. There are so many shiny things – competing for my attention. Sometimes it is hard to sit down and tune them out.

And that’s what we have to do – in order to hear the Spirit. After all, the Spirit speaks so us in a still, small voice. Nephi teaches his brothers:

“…he hath spoken unto you in a still small voice, but ye were past feeling, that ye could not feel his words;” – 1 Nephi 17:45

Usually, I think of being “past feeling” as being wicked. But there may be other things that get in the way – so that we can’t feel the promptings of the Spirit. Maybe it’s noise. Maybe it is choices we’re making. Maybe it is because we’re out of practice. Whatever it is, understanding the Spirit does take more than rational thought: it takes listening with our spiritual “ears.” It takes feeling.

When you do finally slow down, be still, and know God, then we hear His Spirit, then we find the convergence of intellect and intuition. We receive revelation. Our faith is bolstered, and we receive testimony.

Finally, I love this: It’s a discipline; you have to practice it.
So true. Being close to the Spirit requires discipline. It requires devotion to the Lord. We have to practice listening to the Spirit, or we will never recognize it when He does whisper to our souls.

An example is in 3 Nephi 11, when the Savior visits the people on the American Continent. They hear a voice coming from Heaven, two times, and both times, as the scriptures tell:

“…they heard the voice, and they understood it not.” – 3 Nephi 11: 3, 4

Finally, the third time the following occurs:

“5 And again the third time they did hear the voice, and did open their ears to hear it; and their eyes were towards the sound thereof; and they did look steadfastly towards heaven, from whence the sound came.

6 And behold, the third time they did understand the voice which they heard;…” – 3 Nephi 11:5-6

It isn’t until the people act in a disciplined manner – listening and looking – that they understand the voice of the Lord.

***
I am so grateful to have the gospel in my life. I’m grateful that I believe in the Living God, who loves me enough to listen to me and teach me personally through His spirit. I know that there is work I need to do – I need to learn how He speaks to me. I need to open my ears, eyes, and heart. I need to increase my intellect. And as I do, He will guide me.

1 Comment
by chococatania on January 7, 2012  •  Permalink
Posted in Discipline 2012, Doctrine and Covenants, Insights, Reflections
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Posted by chococatania on January 7, 2012

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2012/01/07/intuition-intellect-and-the-gift-of-the-holy-ghost/

Cookie Dough and Bucket Lists – YW Class Activity Idea

In case you don’t know, I’m currently serving as the first counselor in my ward’s Young women’s organization. I love it.

First of all, we have a really amazing group of girls. Second of all, it is fun!

So…last night, we had our first activity for the year. Here’s an idea of what we did – maybe it will help you.

Cookie Dough
When we were planning the activity, the girls said that they wanted to make cookie dough and then eat it for an activity. I figured why not, so we planned on it.

I found a recipe online for eggless cookie dough.
2 1/2 cups flour
1/4 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
1 cup butter
3/4 cup sugar
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup milk
2 tsp vanilla
1 cup or so chocolate chips

1. Beat the butter and sugars until fluffy.
2. Add the milk and vanilla.
3. Beat in the flour, salt, and baking soda. (you may find that the batter is dry, if so, add in milk as needed)
4. Mix in chocolate chips.
5. Either chill so it hardens a bit or enjoy.

Obviously, the young women were ready to eat it as soon as it was mixed up. I also brought some ice cream so we could mix the cookie dough and ice cream together.

Since I’m a responsible young women’s leader, I couldn’t leave the activity simply at cookie dough. I knew that we needed to have a purpose.

One of the young women in our class turns sixteen this week (we will miss her), and it got me thinking about birthdays. I also have had the idea of New Year’s resolutions in my head. So, I figured that the perfect activity would be to make “bucket lists.”

Bucket List
We didn’t make traditional “bucket lists” for this activity – as in things to do before we die. Instead, we decided to do a list of things to do before our next birthday. For example: Sixteen things to do before I turn sixteen…
(Did I mention that I have a really awesome group of Mia Maids?!)

The Mia Maid Advisor and I brought fun cardstock and markers and let the girls eat ice cream, cookie dough, and write their lists. It was a lot of fun.

***
My only regret with the evening is that I didn’t take more time expressing the importance of living a happy and abundant life. One of the young women in our class is going through a very poignant trial. Her father had a stroke last weekend, and he remembers very little. You can read about her family’s experience here. Warning: you will cry! But their hope and positivity are amazing. As I was getting paper and supplies together for this activity, I couldn’t help but think about how fragile our lives our – and how important it is to have goals, to build relationships, and never to take for granted our short time on this earth. I have been taught this lesson time and again this last year. I need to really do it myself.

I didn’t write a “bucket list.” But I feel like I should have…So, I’m going to write mine here.

34 Things to Do Before I Turn 34

  1. Run a 5K in less than 30 minutes.
  2. Do two pull-ups.
  3. Read Atlas Shrugged.
  4. Read Anna Karenina.
  5. Finish my Italian Rosetta Stone Course.
  6. Play a game of tennis – with anyone.
  7. Make Croissants.
  8. Submit my Scripture Study book for publishing.
  9. Enter a poetry contest.
  10. Make my brother’s blanket.
  11. Memorize 1 new scripture a month.
  12. Read the Doctrine and Covenants 2 more times.
  13. Hold FHE each week.
  14. Create a budget .xls for 2012 and keep it up monthly.
  15. Go on a hike.
  16. Use the telescope monthly.
  17. Find a constellation – other than Big or Little Dippers.
  18. Write 3 humorous essays.
  19. Take the kids on mommy-daughter (son) dates.
  20. Ride my bike.
  21. Create good artwork.
  22. Enjoy the process of life.
  23. Be a disciple of the Savior.
  24. Don’t be jealous of others, instead, find happiness in their opportunities and success.
  25. Learn a new (classical) song on the piano.
  26. Learn a new (popular) song on the piano (by ear).
  27. Teach children how to play the piano.
  28. Bake 5 new bread recipes -including sourdough…
  29. 52 dates with Homey.
  30. Get Family book from 2011 printed.
  31. Write letters to my grandmas.
  32. Go to the temple for my ancestors.
  33. Fit into my pre-pregnancy pants.
  34. Work on becoming rather than accomplishing.

What are some of the items on your “bucket” list?

11 Comments
by chococatania on January 5, 2012  •  Permalink
Posted in Activities, Callings, Discipline 2012, Goals, Young Women's
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Posted by chococatania on January 5, 2012

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2012/01/05/cookie-dough-and-bucket-lists-yw-class-activity-idea/

Welcome 2012!

So…it’s here. I’m kind of excited about the new year. I always get a little bit excited about the new year, actually.

I know that there are some people who love to set goals and others who kind of hate it. I actually like the New Year – the chance to evaluate life: where I’ve been, where I am, and where I’m headed.

I think that I’m in an okay place – let me explain. In many ways my life is blessed. I’m grateful for all of my blessings. As far as my material blessings and situation in life go, I’m doing great. I have nothing to complain about. However, as far as my direction – that I’m headed, mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually, I feel like I’m okay, but if I don’t watch myself and make a few changes, then the trajectory I’m on will take me to a place that I don’t necessarily want to be.

I know why I’m in this situation. I’ve had my fourth child, things are different for me now. He is nearly a year old. Life with an infant is always in a kind of limbo-state for me. You know, feeding, naptimes, teething…it is really great, and life needs to be in a “limbo” state – so you can take care of your infant. But now that he is nearly a year, I realize that I need to get back on the horse in many ways. Things are starting to balance out – get even…I don’t know how to describe it. Life is still busy – raising children is always hard work, but the infant months are nearly over, which means I am getting more sleep, I don’t have to spend so much time on the couch nursing a child…you know…he is more responsive, can play, and soon will be walking and talking.

So…it is time for me to make a few changes. I’ve noticed that I need to start creating better habits. I need to have discipline. I want to be a better person.

So, my overarching goal for the year is to cultivate more discipline in my life. I feel like if I learn to exercise discipline, I will be able to achieve some of the other goals I have for myself: like getting in shape/losing weight, being more creative, and learning Italian.

I’ve been thinking about this goal – discipline – and I’ve realized that there will be a key in my ability to achieve it: finding joy in the process.

So…Discipline and “The Process” are my major foci/goals for the year. It’s funny to me, too. Instead of having real specific goals, I’m looking at a more abstract idea. I know that this seems backwards, and I don’t suggest it for everyone, but I know that it is what I need.

I know that I tend to get so focused on a goal or two, I overlook the blessing of the journey. For example, if someone makes the goal to read the Book of Mormon, sometimes they may begin to rush through their study. They get so caught up on the goal: reading the Book of Mormon, that they forget why they set the goal in the first place. Most of our goals aren’t about finishing things or doing things, but we set them so we can become better people. This change doesn’t happen because we accomplished something. The change comes as we diligently work – it comes over time: line upon line, precept upon precept. I’ve noticed that, for me, true change comes through the process.

So…this year, I’m going to work on habits – that are all “process related”. For example, instead of making a goal like running a 5K, I’m going to make the goal of working out at least 5 days a week. I want to remember that I love each run instead of getting caught up in a race that will last for only a half an hour. I want to enjoy every single step, every heartbeat. I want to enjoy the difficulty of each thing I do, with the knowledge that such sacrifice will bring satisfaction – daily.

So, this year is about discipline. It is about making good choices daily and consistently. It is about waking up and working hard. It is about smelling the roses and noticing the beauty around me rather than having tunnel vision. This year is about appreciating my life now while I work on having a better future.

I’ll talk more about this goal – discipline and enjoying the process – more throughout the year. I want to work hard on changing my habits, which will require a lot of conscientious effort, but I hope to be a happier, better, more disciplined person by 2013.

What are some of your goals? Do you set specific goals or themes/ideas? Have you set goals in the past? How do you find the way to accomplish them?

4 Comments
by chococatania on January 1, 2012  •  Permalink
Posted in Discipline 2012, Discipline and The Process 2012, Goals
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Posted by chococatania on January 1, 2012

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2012/01/01/welcome-2012/

A Head Start

I know that it’s only November, but I’ve been thinking about the New Year, my resolutions and what I really want with my life.

The past two years, I’ve had a focus for the year. Two years ago, it was Diligence. This year, Charity. I haven’t done much to talk about them here on the blog, but I’ve been thinking about them as I study the scriptures. I read the Book of Mormon looking for Charity. I have also tried to have more of these qualities in my life.

In both instances, I know that these foci are more or less life-long goals. I can’t become “diligent” in a year and then be finished. I can’t obtain charity in a year and then be done with it. They are both life-long attributes that I would like to develop.

I have been happy both this year and last year thinking about these concepts. And two weeks ago, I realized what it is that I need to focus on next year. It came to me in the following scripture:

“This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.” – 1 Timothy 3:1-5

The part that really stuck out to me was incontinent. At first I was thinking of the overactive bladder commercials. But, I looked down at the footnote and saw:

GR without self-control.

I instantly realized that this is what I need to focus on next year – self control, continence, discipline.

There was a time in my life when I had a lot of discipline. I ran 30 miles a week. I ate well. I read my scriptures and prayed. I wrote or painted nearly every day. I worked hard. It was a tough time in my life. I was recently single and a mother of two girls. There was no room in my life to be anything but strictly disciplined. If we wanted to survive, I had to do everything right. Because of my discipline, I was able to provide for my children, run a marathon, lose weight, and find happiness in the midst of adversity.

Now…my life isn’t really full of tough trials. Instead, the trial I face is that of free time and abundance. I haven’t exercised true discipline in a while.

I’m not out going completely crazy, but my life is out of balance. The lack of balance is causing me to feel upset and frustrated with myself and with my life. It is funny because I have so much, but because of my lack of discipline I feel like I am missing something.

I’m reminded of the scripture

“He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.” – Matthew 10:39

When we lose our lives for the Lord’s sake, when we become his disciples, then we will “find our lives.” We will be filled with the confidence and peace that comes with accomplishing goals and growing closer to the Lord.

So…I need to be more disciplined.

And I’m going to make that my focus for 2012. And, since I have it figured out now, I think that I’m going to get a head start on it.

Hooray for 2012, Hooray for goals, hooray for Discipline!

What do you do to exercise discipline? Any hints? Also, have you started thinking of what your goals for 2012 will be?

4 Comments
by chococatania on November 27, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Discipline 2012, Goals

Posted by chococatania on November 27, 2011

http://thatgoodpart.wordpress.com/2011/11/27/a-head-start/

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